GovLoop’s Bureaucrat on College Sports – Ranking the Atlantic Coast Conference Football Bowl Subdivision Teams

Readers, the Hokie Guru is taking a corporate income tax course this summer (over four weeks) and the intensity is incredible. The Hokie Guru needs this course so that he can convert to the GS-511 Auditor job series. As a result, my blog posts may be a bit more infrequent, but the Hokie Guru will try to keep up. By the way, please notice that the Hokie Guru is continuing his tradition of speaking in the third person. The Guru, here, reminds you that communication is very important. The Hokie guru, repeats, communication is very important.

Last week, the Hokie Guru previewed his favorite college football team, the Virginia Tech Hokies. The Hokie Guru was awesome. This week, I will rank the teams in the Atlantic Coast Conference (ACC).

The ACC has expanded in recent years and opinions are mixed on the success of the venture. The Hokie Guru will note, however, that the ACC has been very good to Virginia Tech.

Anyway, I digress. The ACC has two divisions; the Coastal Division and the Atlantic Division. Without further ado, let’s begin the rankings… to the tower:

Atlantic Division

1.) Clemson – The Tigers have the most experienced team in the ACC and best running back tandem in the country. In theory, the Tigers should win it all. The Hokie Guru predicts that the Tigers will be in the ACC Championship Game in December.

2.) Wake Forest – Winston-Salem is not the easiest place to recruit, yet, all Jim Grobe does is win.

3.) Florida $tate –While I appreciate the good government gesture on the part of F$U to make reduced-price tickets available to Tallahassee Community College students (like many, the Hokie Guru was a college student had student loans and was broke like everyone), times have really changed for this football program. Perhaps F$U can also offer these tickets to federal government employees or the military members and their spouses in the State of Florida.

4.) Maryland – The Terrapins seem like they are a team destined for a tier three bowl game (Emerald Walnut Bowl). The Hokie Guru must report on a little known statistic about Maryland quarterback, Chris Turner. His father was the original drummer in Ratt. One of the Hokie Guru’s favorite hair metal bands is Ratt.

5.) Boston College – Let’s see how life is without Matt Ryan.

6.) North Carolina State – While North Carolina State is in the cellar right now, the Hokie Guru feels that the Wolfpack is a sleeping giant. Surely you can’t be serious? I am… and don’t call me Shirley.

Coastal Division

1.) Virginia Tech – Virginia Tech won the ACC title last year. Frank Beamer has been the head coach at Virginia Tech since 1987. Longevity of a coaching staff is an indicator of future success. Virginia Tech has two Thursday night games on ESPN this year (one with Miami). What a perfect excuse to have your AWS day on Thursday. The Hokie Guru predicts an appearance in this year’s ACC Championship game. The Hokie Guru plans to fly to Tampa to watch this game with GovLoop.

2.) North Carolina – Why is the Hokie Guru rating the Tar Heels this high? Georgia Tech has a new coach, Duke has a new coach, Miami has a second year coach, and you get the idea. It’s not that I’m high on this team; I just think that North Carolina is due for a second-tier bowl, the Continental Tire Bowl.

3.) Georgia Tech – The Hokie Guru is picking Georgia Tech third in the Costal Division for no other reason, other than the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center (FLETC) is in the State of Georgia. FLETC is part of the Department of Homeland Security. Notice the link with Georgia? A massively brilliant connection from the Hokie Guru.

4.) Miami – Miami is about two years away from being back at the top of the ACC (the ‘Canes had a top five recruiting class last year). This is good for the league. While they are young now, the ‘Canes, with good coaching, will be good in the future. The Hokie Guru would like to go to Miami.

5.) Duke – According to Matt Hayes of the Sporting News, “Duke attorneys recently argued that the school shouldn’t have to pay a $450,000 cancellation fee to back out of the final three games of a series with Louisville because Louisville could easily find an opponent of “similar stature.” Louisville wanted a BCS school because Duke is, as far as we know, a BCS school. So two weeks ago, in a circuit court in the great state of Kentucky, Duke attorneys argued that the school’s football team is the worst in Division I and any replacement team would suffice. And they won.” The Hokie Guru would not use this strategy to instill confidence in a football team. The Hokie Guru, though, will give you an upset special: Duke will beat Miami this year. And if they beat Miami, the Blue Devils will be playing in the inaugural Congressional Bowl in Washington, DC.

6.) Virginia – Tennis anyone? Yes, the Hokie Guru is picking the Wahoos dead last in the ACC. Duke will have a better year than the Wahoos.

Thanks for sticking around… the Hokie Guru plans to take a look at the nation’s premier football conferences, including the Big Ten (they can’t add… they have 11 teams… we can add in the ACC), the Big East, the Pacific Ten, the Big 12, and the Southeastern Conference. I hope you had fun this week. Notify the Guru if you love the post.

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Can’t Duke just get Coach K to coach football as well? And it makes me happy to see FSU and Miami suffer. I like the Airplanes quotes but really I’m just looking for the Big East preview. Go Bulls.