One wedding tradition that I’ve always admired is that before a wedding, married men would take the groom aside and impart whatever wisdom they had gained to the newest member of the League of Married Men.
Recently, Alex Howard joined the club and in a few weeks, Steve Ressler will be inducted. Here are five things I’ve learned in the course of my years. Other Married Men (and women!) please add your thoughts below.
- Do the laundry, and when doing so, read the tags–if it says “lay flat to dry,” do not put it in the dryer!
- Cook; learn to make at least 3 salads, 5 entrees, 3 desserts.
- Take a lot of pictures and at least once a year, make a book of photos.
- Learn the names and stones and metals and find out which ones she likes (topaz? citrine? sapphire? lapis?)
- Give her cards for small reasons and write something in them to indicate when you gave them to her.
Here is a bonus, but this is as true for women as for men:
- Learn the formulae for sincere apologies and thanks (apology: “I’m sorry I did X. It was wrong and I won’t do it again.” no excuses, just an admission of guilt and a promise not to repeat. “Thank you for X. It was really thoughtful/generous/amazing etc.” Focus on the gift and the giver, not on yourself)
Here is a double bonus. I can’t take credit for this, it was given to a friend of mine by his father about 3 minutes before my friend walked down the aisle.
Never miss an opportunity to keep your mouth shut.